In many relationships, there comes a time when one or both of you want a separate space and time. Some people may see this as a red flag and immediately jump to the conclusion that the person who wants space no longer loves them or is already in a relationship with someone else. This may not necessarily be the case. If you’re in a relationship that’s struggling and you’re having a hard time working through your issues, taking a break from each other can be a way to clear your mind and gain a better perspective on the situation. When you live with and deal with one person every day, it can be hard to really take the time to do the “own work” you need to repair the relationship.
One of the biggest problems with lesbian relationships is the fact that women tend to love fast and hard. Lesbian relationships accelerate very quickly at first and both parties lose themselves in each other. Once you make that deep connection, it’s like the whole world ceases to exist and they can only see each other. You stop going out with your friends, your routine changes and all you can think about is this wonderful woman who has come into your life. Well, as time goes on and the relationship begins to grow and develop, one or both of you may begin to realize that they have lost some of their individuality and want it back. If you feel the need to rediscover your individual self, the key is to openly communicate your needs to your partner. This can be a difficult conversation because many people become naturally fearful whenever someone mentions the need for space in a relationship.
There are several ways to take a break without “breaking up.” Taking a break may simply mean altering your routine and not spending every waking moment together. Take a weekend off and go to a resort with your girlfriends, or go fishing with your friends. There is some truth to the old saying that “absence makes the heart grow fond.” A couple I know saved their relationship when one of them took a position at work that required monthly travel. They described the time apart as an opportunity to rediscover the feeling of missing and longing for each other, which added a much-needed spark to their relationship. Be creative in how you find ways to give yourself the space and time to take care of yourself. If we learn to take better care of ourselves, we will ultimately be better partners in our relationships.