Your girlfriend says she needs to find herself. That’s one of those puzzling things women say that men can’t quite understand. Does it mean that she is just taking a step back from the relationship so she can focus on her own needs? Is it a sign that she is so in love with you that she feels she is losing her own identity or is it something else? Unfortunately, when a woman says that she needs to find herself, she means that she is being nice by telling you that she is no longer happy or that she is not satisfied in her relationship with you. If your girlfriend tells you that she needs some time or space to work things out, you need to fight back if you have any hope of saving her relationship.
When your girlfriend says that she needs to find herself, you should take that statement very seriously. If you tell her that she is being silly or overly dramatic, you will damage your connection with her in a very lasting way. She will feel that her voice is not heard and she will feel you for not understanding her needs. In turn, her desire to find herself will lead to an eventual breakup and whatever future you have been planning will never come to pass.
Being considerate and compassionate during this time will go a long way in helping her feel closer to you again. If you tell her that you understand that she needs to find herself, she will probably be pleasantly surprised. She will feel respected and valued as a woman and as a partner. She will see you as someone who really wants what’s best for her, even if it doesn’t seem like it’s what’s best for you.
Encourage her to explore her life on her own for a while. Don’t bring up the idea of a breakup at all. Let him set the pace for how much time he needs and how he uses that time. Stay in touch with her as you two explore your lives separately. Ask him questions about how he is doing and what is going on in his life. Invest in those conversations and be interested in what he feels.
If you show your girlfriend that you can be a caring and supportive friend during this process, she will feel closer to you. In many cases a woman seeks to find herself when she feels abandoned by her man. If you strive to be a better match for her by being more kind and considerate to her, she will reconsider her decision to find herself. It is possible that she realizes that she is at her best when she is with you.